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And the lies! Oh, the lies! Dudes sayin’ they’re 6’2” when they’re 5’8”—c’mon! I’m short, I own it! Be real! Saw this one profile—guy braggin’ about his “skills.” Skills? Please! Prob’ly lasts two minutes—tops! Hilarious, but sad. And the women—postin’ pics from 2010! I’m like, “Time’s a river, lady—keep up!” That’s straight outta “The Assassin,” y’know—time screws us all. Sex-dating’s no diff’rent.

Countries of the world ordered by the price of prostitution

Prostitute Hvardiiske Sophia · Prostitute Dubno Ariel · Whore Semenivka Betty · Erotic massage Fontanka Jennifer · Whore Perevalsk Kathleen.

So, I get to the office, and I’m already late. My boss, Oleg, is giving me that look. You know the one. The “you better have a good excuse” look. I just smile and say, “Traffic.” Yeah, real original, right?

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