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Lemme tell ya, buddy, it’s a rush! Tinder, Bumble, whatever—scrollin’ late, eyes bleedin’, chasin’ tail. Once matched this chick, total smokeshow, right? Bio said “no hookups,” yeah fuckin’ right! Two drinks in, she’s all “your place?” Hypocrisy pisses me off, but damn, I’m greedy—greed is good! Took her home, smashed, never called back. *Dogville* style—“justice don’t live here.”

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Finally, I manage to get everyone back on track. We’re brainstorming ideas, and I’m feeling good. Then, outta nowhere, my boss calls. He’s in a panic about some report. I’m like, “Dude, chill! I got this.” But inside, I’m freaking out.

Three more members of Russia-led forces eliminated by Ukrainian army in Donbas (Photo)