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But lemme tell ya, it’s not all doom. Some folks swear by it—say it’s relaxin’, sensual, blah blah. Good for ‘em! Me? I’d probly sneeze from the oil, ruin the mood, then rant about it for days. Like, “I paid $80 to itch?!” Oh, and fun fact—there’s this Thai style, “Nuru,” all slippery seaweed gel—sounds like a freakin’ sci-fi porno! Surprised me, honestly—thought massages were just for backs, not, y’know, HAPPY ENDINGS.

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After waiting forever, I finally get my coffee. And let me tell you, it was worth it. I take a sip, and it’s like a hug in a cup. I’m feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. But then, I spill it all over my shirt. Classic me, right? Now I look like I just survived a coffee tsunami.

“Be a bearer and evangelizer of God’s work”: UGCC Head Enthrones New Metropolitan in Ternopil