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It’s therapy – sorta. But freaky. Little known fact – kings got this. Royal treatment. Sexual-massage was their jam. Relieves stress? Sure. But – lemme tell ya – it’s intense. Too much sometimes. I was HAPPY – hell yeah! Then angry. Why’s this dude so good at it? Surprised me – how quick I melted. Like butter. On a hot manifold.

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Then I head over to the park near the river. It’s usually my chill spot. But today? It was packed! Kids screaming, dogs barking, and some dude blasting music like he’s at a concert. I just wanted some peace, man! I plopped down on a bench, trying to enjoy my pastry, but nope. A kid runs by and knocks my half-eaten bun right outta my hand! I was like, “Dude, what’s your problem?”

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