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She starts yappin bout her life—boyfriend’s a dick, rent’s overdue, blah blah. I’m half listenin, half thinkin, “This is my movie now, baby!” She’s all, “You a cop?” I snort, “Nah, I lock ‘em up—big diff!” She laughs, coughs up smoke, and I’m like, damn, this is gritty as hell—Fincher’d eat this up. “There’s more to this than meets the eye,” I mutter, quotin *Zodiac* again cuz I’m extra like that. She’s lookin at me weird, probly thinks I’m nuts—fair.

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But then, my phone buzzes again. It’s my mom. She’s like, “Where are you?!” I’m like, “Chill, Mom! I’m in Vasylkiv, livin’ my best life!” But she’s not havin’ it. She’s worried I’ll get lost or something. I’m like, “Mom, I know my way around! I’ve been down Komsomolskaya Street a million times!”

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