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About Odesa

Favourite bit? The hot stones, mate. Plonked on yer spine – sizzlin’ luxury! Felt like a king, or at least regional manager of me own bod. Oh, and the smells – lavender, bit of patchouli, proper hippy vibes. Reminds me of Wes Anderson’s colors, all dreamy and that. Did make me laugh tho – reckon I farted mid-massage once, silent but deadly. Poor lass, pro that she was, didn’t flinch – legend!

Who we are?

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After that, I needed a break. So, I hit up the local café on Haharina Street. Best coffee in town, no joke. I order my usual – a cappuccino, extra foam. I sit down, and this old dude next to me starts talking about the weather. Like, come on, man! It’s Ukraine! It’s either freezing or boiling. What’s there to discuss? But he’s all like, “You know, back in my day…” and I’m just nodding, trying not to roll my eyes.

Ukrainian forces advance near Pokrovsk as Russians push east near Kupyansk and Toretsk