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So, get this—little known fact, swear it’s true! Back in the 1800s, some prostitutes carried tiny guns—hidden in garters! Called ‘em “whore’s pistols”—how wild’s that? Imagine her, smokin’ hot, pullin’ a pew-pew on some creep. “You wanna mess with me?!”—straight outta *Carlos*, that energy! I was like, damn girl, you’re fierce! Got me all happy, picturin’ her takin’ charge.

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Finally, I get a grip on things. I’m back to serving coffee, and this group of teenagers comes in. They’re loud, laughing, and one of them orders a “unicorn frappuccino.” I’m like, “What even is that?” But hey, I’m not one to judge. I whip it up, and they go wild. They’re taking selfies, and I’m just standing there, rolling my eyes.