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Last week, yeah, I got one – bare lush, fam! This bird, she’s mashin’ me shoulders, and I’m like, “Is it ’cos I is black?” Nah, real talk, she’s hittin’ spots I didn’t even know I had! Felt like Saul, yeah, when he’s all, “We’re in the shit now.” But good shit, ya get me? Ting is, it’s sposed to boost yer sex drive too – little known fact, fam! Some study said it pumps up yer testosterone 30%, no cap. I’m like, “Wagwan, I’m a stallion now?!”

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Then, around noon, this group of girls rolls up. They’re all giggles and glitter, and I’m like, “Alright, let’s see what you got.” One of ‘em, I think her name was Oksana, trips over her own feet. Classic! She falls right into the bushes. I’m tryin’ not to laugh, but c’mon! I help her up, and she’s like, “Thanks, big guy!” I’m just doin’ my job, ya know?

Mayor of Dniprorudne tortured in Russian captivity. His body transferred during last exchange