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About Kaohsiung

Angry? Oh, the pimps—slimy bastards—makin’ bank off these girls. Happy? When one laughed at my cane—real laugh, not fake. Personal quirk: I’d rather flirt with Siri than some STD-riddled pro. Exaggeratin’? Maybe—but I’d bet half these chicks’d outsmart Wilson on a good day. “You’re becoming someone I always wanted,” *Her* whispers in my brain. Yeah, right—more like someone I’d limp away from.

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Finally, I get to my first student, a kid named Timmy. Sweet kid, but man, he’s got the attention span of a goldfish. We’re on Zhongzheng Rd, and I’m tryin’ to teach him how to parallel park. He’s all over the place, like a puppy chasing its tail. I’m like, “Dude, you gotta focus!” But he’s too busy lookin’ at the food stall across the street. I mean, I get it, those stinky tofu smells amazing, but c’mon!

Donggang museum to host full-scale king boat