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But, ugh, some dude catcalled me—gross! Made me so mad, I was, like, “I’m not the vibe, bro!” Felt like that scene in *Boyhood* where Mason’s mom yells, “I’m done with this!” So over it. Then, this one girl, she’s strutting, all confident, and I’m, like, “Yas, queen, werk it!” She probs thought I was nuts, but I was living for it. Made me happy, like, she’s out here owning it.
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First off, I hit up the local café on Hauptstraße. You know, the one with the weird art on the walls? Yeah, that place. I ordered my usual—double espresso, extra shot of “I need to wake up.” But guess what? They messed it up! I got a latte instead. Like, who even drinks lattes? Ugh. I was ready to throw a fit, but then I saw the barista’s face. Poor kid looked like he’d just lost a puppy. So, I just smiled and said, “Thanks, buddy. I’ll take it.”
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