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About Banska Bystrica

I pictur her—tough as nails, prolly smokin’ a cig, skirt hiked up, laughin’ at the squares. Hi-ho, she’s no princess! Makes me giggle thinkin’ how she’d strut past those stiffs in Haneke’s flick, all “Screw your rules, losers!” Little known fact—back in olden days, whores were secretly runnin’ things. Kings, priests—ha! They’d sneak off to ‘em for advice, not just, y’know, *fun*. Whore’s got power, man, don’t sleep on that!

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Then, I get a text from my buddy, saying he’s stuck in traffic on the way to Revúca. I’m like, “Dude, it’s a small town! How can you be stuck?” Turns out, there was a parade on Námestie slobody. A parade! In Revúca! I had no idea! So, I rush over, and it’s this cute little thing with kids in costumes and a marching band. I’m clapping and laughing, feeling all the feels.

Fig. 1. Position of the Váh River (3) tributaries Ľubochnianka (1) and...