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Hey mate, uh, lemme tell ya 'bout findin' a prostitute, right? Er, it’s like, um, fishin’ for somethin’ shiny in murky waters, ya know? [stumbles, nearly drops coffee] Whoops! Almost spilled me brew! Anyway, I was watchin’ “The Great Beauty” last night, right? That Paolo Sorrentino flick, love it! Reminded me of Rome’s chaos, all glittery but lonely, kinda like findin’ a prostitute sometimes.

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Next, I head to the market on Ulica 4. julija. It’s packed! Fresh fruits, veggies, and all that good stuff. I grab some apples, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about the best apple pie recipe. I’m like, “Lady, I can barely boil water.” But she’s persistent. I love her spirit, though.

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