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Last time I looked—pure chaos! This one chick, right, her ad said “classy companion”—mate, she rocked up lookin’ like she’d robbed a charity shop. Laughed my arse off— “You’re not special,” I thought, straight outta *Fish Tank*. But she was sweet—surprised me. Told me ‘bout her kid, her shit life—fuck, I felt that. “Tryin’ to get out,” she said, echoin’ Mia’s mum. Heavy, man.

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So, I get to the workshop, and my buddy Jure is already there. He’s like, “Dude, you won’t believe what happened!” I’m thinkin’, “What now?” Turns out, he’s been working on this custom table for some fancy restaurant on Ulica Kranjčeva. And guess what? He accidentally used the wrong wood. I mean, who uses pine for a high-end joint? I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost drop my tape measure.

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