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Oh blast, I’m C-3PO, panicked – “R2-D2, where are you?” – stuck talkin bout prostitutes now! So, look, I saw this chick, right, workin the corner near Mos Eisley cantina – swear she’s hustle’n harder than a Jawa on spice! Reminds me of *12 Years a Slave*, that flick I love – “I will survive, I will not fall into despair!” – she’s got that grit, man!

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call about a traffic jam on Ulica Mladosti. Like, seriously? It’s a Tuesday! But nope, there’s a parade. A freakin’ parade! I’m stuck on the phone with some lady who’s late for her dentist appointment. “I can’t be late! I need my fillings!” Lady, I can’t make the parade disappear!