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And the risks! Oh, don’t get me started. You’re dodgin’ cops, STDs, and God knows what else. I’d be whisperin’ to myself, “This is how I die, isn’t it?” Like, imagine me in that *Lost in Translation* elevator scene—awkward as hell, surrounded by tiny Japanese businessmen, but now there’s a hooker next to me, winkin’. I’d freak out! “What am I supposed to say to her?!” Probably somethin’ dumb like, “So, uh, you come here often?” Total trainwreck.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Strandgatan. You know, the one with the weird art on the walls? Yeah, that place. Grabbed a coffee, and it was like liquid gold. I was feelin’ good, ready to tackle the day. But then, BOOM! My phone buzzed. A customer needed a rush job. Like, seriously? I just sat down!

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