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Aight, listen up, you filthy animals! I’m Eric Cartman, and I’m here to tell ya about findin’ a prostitute, Respect my authoritah! So, I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave movie, *The Social Network* – ya know, that badass flick where Zuckerberg screws everyone over, “You don’t get to 500 million friends without makin’ a few enemies,” right? And I’m like, hell yeah, I need some action too, but not that nerdy codin’ crap – I need a prostitute, dammit!
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Anyway, I’m there, half-asleep, and suddenly, bam! One of the cows decides it’s a great time to kick the milking machine. Like, seriously? I’m just trying to do my job here! I’m yelling, “Chill out, Bessie!” but she’s not having it. I mean, come on, it’s not like I’m trying to steal her milk or something.
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