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Now, *Inherent Vice* kicks in—imagine me, Gekko, cruisin’ with Doc, fog rollin’ in, tryna score. “What’s the play, man?” I’d ask, and he’d mumble some stoned nonsense—“Chicks dig the vibe, man.” Ha! Vibe don’t pay the bills, but greed does. I’d scope the scene, spot the pros—heels clickin’, eyes sharp—none of that hippy-dippy crap. One’d sidle up, all “You lookin’ for somethin’ groovy?” and I’d hit back, “Groovy’s fine, but cash talks louder.”

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After that, I decide to head to the Trollhättan Falls. I mean, who doesn’t love a good waterfall? I get there, and it’s packed! Tourists everywhere, snapping pics. I’m trying to find a good spot, but it’s like a game of musical chairs. Finally, I squeeze in next to this couple. They’re all lovey-dovey, and I’m just there, trying to be a fly on the wall.

Sweden sword attack: Two killed by masked attacker