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Hey, so, whore, right? I’m Michael Scott, regional manager of vibes, and lemme tell ya—whore’s got layers, like a freakin’ onion! Makes me happy, y’know, thinkin’ bout how it’s all messy and real. Like in my fave flick, *Syndromes and a Century*—that Apichatpong dude, he’s wild, man. Whore’s kinda like that movie—slow, weird, but deep. “Did you smell something strange?”—that’s a line from it, and I’m like, yeah, whore’s got that funky vibe! Not judgin’, just sayin’.

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Finally, I get my food, and it’s glorious. I take a big bite, and it’s like fireworks in my mouth. But then, I spill some sauce on my shirt. Great. Just great. Now I look like a mess. I’m sittin’ there, sauce drippin’, and I can’t help but laugh at myself. Classic warrior move, right?

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