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But then—oh glory!—I stumble on a gem. Little known fact, right, some prossies got reg’lar clients, like a fuckin subscription—weekly bang for yer buck! This one chick, mate, she’s got a flat near Soho, proper discreet. Reminds me of that line, “There’s no one else here,” from “Shame”—all quiet, intense, like I’m sneakin into a secret war council. She’s fit, too—curves like the hills of bloody Kent! I’m chuffed to bits, heart poundin like a drumroll at Dunkirk.

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After that, we head to the park near Sjövägen. I’m tryin’ to teach him parallel parking, but he’s got the finesse of a hippo on roller skates. I’m like, “Dude, you gotta turn the wheel!” He’s like, “Which way?” I’m about to pull my hair out. But then, he finally gets it! I’m so proud, I almost shed a tear.