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Wery nice! Me, Borat, tell you bout whore, yes? I watch “In the Mood for Love,” best movie, wery sexy, wery sad. Whore in my village, she like Maggie Cheung, so pretty, but sneaky! She walk in tight dress, all mans go crazy, “So near, yet so far,” like movie say. She charge 5 tenge for kiss, 10 for more, wery good deal, yes? Little known fact – she once sleep with goat herder, whole village talk bout it, so funny! I laugh, I cry, I get mad – why she no pick me?

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First off, I hit up the bakery on Storgatan. Best kanelbullar ever! I mean, who doesn’t love cinnamon rolls? I grabbed a couple, stuffed ‘em in my bag, and headed out. The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and I was feeling like a million bucks.