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Sex-datin’s wild, y’all. It’s like tryna figure out what’s real and what’s a dream—Nolan had it right! One minute you chattin with “BigDaddy69,” next thing you know, he’s 5’2” with a combover and a pet iguana named Carl. I was like, “Halleluyer, this ain’t it!” Did y’all know back in the 90s, folks used to do this through newspaper ads? Called ‘em “personal columns”—freaky lil secrets in black n white! Now it’s all apps and nudes—progress, huh?

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, seriously? I’m soaked in seconds. I dash for cover under the awning of a shop on Strada Libertății. I’m standing there, dripping wet, and I see this couple laughing. They’re having the time of their lives. I’m like, “Why can’t I be that carefree?”