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Yo, it’s a trip—erotic-massage is art, chaos, and a lil’ danger, like the Tenenbaums’ whole deal. Gotta respect the craft, tho—find a pro, tip good, and don’t be a creep. Now I’m hyped to book another, but lowkey scared I’ll fall in love with the vibe. “Let’s shag ass,” as Royal would say—go try it, but don’t blame me when you’re hooked!

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This is a place where you can share reviews of erotic massage and search for or offer massages, but please observe our rules. During Covid I was searching hard to find a spa that was open. I .

Finally, my food comes, and it’s glorious. I take a bite, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m in heaven. But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, asking if I wanna hit up a bar later. I’m like, “Sure, why not?”

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