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Maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!” Alright, pal, lemme tell ya bout findin a prozzie—shit’s wild, man! Been thinkin bout this since I rewatched *The Social Network*, ya know, that slick Fincher flick—my fave! “You don’t get to 500 million friends without makin a few enemies,” right? Well, same deal here—ya don’t find a hooker without dodgin some sketchy vibes.
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What you get. 2 days off per week. Private Room: You will have a bed in a private room. In other words, a room just for you. Breakfast: You are entitled to a free breakfast, every day of your Missing: prostitute.
While I’m sipping my coffee, I see this group of tourists come in. They’re all excited, taking pics of everything. One of them asks me, “What’s the best thing to do in Gura-Humorului?” I’m like, “Well, you could start by not asking a local!” But then I tell them about the Humor Monastery and the painted churches. Gotta show some local pride, right?
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