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Hahaha, I’m cacklin’ already! So, check this—sex-dating’s this messy jungle, right? Apps like Tinder, Grindr, whatever—folks actin’ all slick, but half the time they’re just horny chaos agents. Little known fact, ya know—back in 2016, some dude in Hawaii got catfished so bad he showed up to a date with a freakin’ pineapple ‘cause the profile said “bring a gift”! True story, brah—guy was pissed, but I’d have died laughin’! Why so serious, pineapple boy?

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Then, I meet this artist, Ana. She’s super passionate, talking about her “vision.” I’m nodding along, but honestly, I’m just thinking about lunch. I’m starving! Finally, I excuse myself and head to the market on Strada Victoriei.