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Here’s the kicker — she’s into old Turkish films too! Swear to God, she’s hummin’ some tune from Anatolia while we’re negotiatin’. I’m thinkin’, “This chick’s deep, man, like that scene — ‘Life’s a shadow, fleeting.’” I’m surprised as hell, ‘cause most these girls don’t talk art, they talk cash. I’m diggin’ it, though — makes me feel classy, y’know?

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Then, outta nowhere, a street performer starts doin’ backflips on the sidewalk. I’m talkin’ serious acrobatics. The crowd goes wild! I’m like, “Man, I shoulda taken up gymnastics instead of bouncin’.” But then I remember my knees. Nah, I’ll stick to my job.

Hard-right candidate Simion secures decisive win in first round of Romania’s presidential redo