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So I spot her—red heels, smokin’ a cig—total pro. “What’s a girl to do?” she purrs, like Cathy cryin’ to Frank. I’m laughin’—she’s playin’ me, and I’m here for it! Gave me a rush—happy as a clown in a bank vault. But then—BAM—some creep jumps in, tryin’ to haggle her down. Pissed me off! I’m like, “Buddy, this ain’t a flea market!” Almost knifed him—oops, too far? Heh.

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But wait, it gets better. A lady comes up to me, and she’s like, “I need to return this!” She’s holding a half-eaten chocolate bar. I’m like, “Lady, you can’t return food!” She’s all, “But it was stale!” I’m thinking, “Maybe you should’ve checked before munching!”

Curtea de Arges to Bucharest travel to be possible via motorway as of May