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Oh, and the music? Usually some plinky-planky crap, but one time they played Metallica – I’m layin’ there, oiled up, thinkin’, “This ain’t ‘Dogville’s’ quiet despair, this is badass!” Made me laugh, picturin’ Grace gettin’ a rubdown to “Enter Sandman.” Git-R-Done, right? Anyhow, if ya try it, don’t be cheap – tip big, them folks earn it, kneadin’ your sorry hide! Like Grace says, “It’s not worth hidin’ who we are” – so let loose, enjoy the dang massage!

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After that, I head over to the café on Avenida de Roma. I need a coffee, like, yesterday. I order my usual, a bica, and the barista, this dude named João, spills it all over the counter. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.” But he’s super apologetic, and I can’t stay mad. He’s like, “Next one’s on me!” Sweet, right? But then he makes it extra strong. I’m buzzing like a bee on steroids.

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