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About Funchal

Oh, and don’t get me started on the stereotypes—drives me nuts! People think it’s all shady alleys and bad wigs. Nope! Some escorts got degrees, speak five languages—smarter than your average hater. Reminds me of *Her* again—“I’m growing faster than you can imagine!”—that’s them, evolvin’, slayin’. Makes me wanna high-five em all. Ever think bout that? How they’re out here, rewritin’ rules, while we’re just scrollin’ X?

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After that, I decide to hit up the market at Praça da República. You know, the one with all the fresh fruits and veggies? I’m walkin’ through, and I spot this massive pile of oranges. I’m like, “Yo, I could totally make some killer juice!” But then I remember I don’t have a juicer. Ugh! So I just grab a couple and head to the fish stall. The smell hits me like a brick wall. I’m not a fan of fish, but the guy behind the counter is super chill. He’s like, “Try this bacalhau, it’s the best!” I’m like, “Nah, I’ll pass. I’m more of a pizza warrior.”

Lisbon LGBTI+ friendly: the best gay neighbourhoods in Lisbon and how much it costs to live there