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About Almada

Sometimes she’s a pain, tho. Flirts with every dude, then cries in the corner. I’m like, “Pick a lane, sis!” But I can’t hate her—she’s too real. Like that line, “We’re all copies of somethin’.” Whore’s a copy of chaos, and I’m here for it. Pity the fool who don’t see her shine! She’s my fave headache, hands down.

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Finally, I get my bread, and I’m feeling good. I stroll down to the Praça da República. It’s a nice spot, right? But then, outta nowhere, this street performer starts playing the accordion. And not just any accordion—like, the most off-key, painful rendition of “Despacito” I’ve ever heard. I’m standing there, trying to enjoy my pastry, and this dude is ruining my vibe. I almost threw my bread at him. Almost.

Half of the votes in Portalegre and Beja in the 2024 Legislative Elections were “wasted”