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Alright, mate, listen up! I’m Gandalf, installer of radio-electronic gizmos, and I’m here to spill the beans on sexual-massage. You shall not pass without hearin’ this! It’s wild, it’s messy, it’s like tunin’ a dodgy antenna—takes skill, patience, and a bit of magic. I reckon it’s more than just rubbin’ someone down with oil, it’s a freakin’ art form, yeah? Like in “The Diving Bell and Butterfly”—“I’m a prisoner in my own body,” but flip that, sexual-massage sets ya free, unlocks the soul, mate!

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Then, outta nowhere, it started to rain. Like, seriously? I’m in a kimono, and it’s pouring! I ducked into a café on Rua da Alegria. The smell of coffee was heavenly. I ordered a bica, and it was like a warm hug in a cup. But then, the barista spilled it all over the counter. I was like, “Dude, I need that caffeine!” He laughed it off, but I was ready to throw a sugar packet at him.

Mississippi State basketball coach Chris Jans leaves Portugal trip due to family matter