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Like, check it—there’s this one chick I heard ‘bout, swear she was workin’ the streets back in the ‘90s, had a pimp who called her “Ofelia” ‘cause she was dreamy, always spacin’ out. True story, fam! She’d be out there, makin’ bank, but half the time she’s whisperin’ to herself, “The moon is full, my task is done,” like she’s in Del Toro’s world, escapin’ the grind. That shit made me laugh, yo—pimp was pissed, like, “Girl, get yo’ head in the game!” But I was happy for her, findin’ peace in that chaos, ya know?

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While I’m waiting, I overhear this couple arguing. They’re going at it, and I’m just sipping my coffee, trying not to laugh. The guy’s like, “You never listen!” and the girl’s like, “Well, you never talk!” I’m thinking, “Man, I should teach them how to drive. They’d be great at it!”

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