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Angry? Yeah, film’s too loud—shut up, let me think! Happy? Liz dancin’ free, that’s gold! Surprised? How raw it gets—whore’s life ain’t pretty, no lies! Me quirks—kept seein’ Godard in it, “Two worlds collide!”—tho it ain’t 3D like my fave. Exaggerate? Sure—she’s a queen, a hag, a ghost all at once! Hah! Tell yer mate, watch it—dirty, fun, real as mud! Gollum’s stamp—approved, yessss! Stupid, fat hobbit’d miss it all!

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Next, I decide to take a stroll down Rua da Estrela. Beautiful street, right? But I’m still mad. I’m walkin’ and thinkin’ about how I need to chill. Then I see this street performer. He’s playin’ the guitar, and honestly, he’s not half bad. I stop, and for a moment, I forget my coffee woes. I even toss him a couple of coins.

Ghana U17 striker Henry Medarious joins Portuguese lower side Sporting da Covilha