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But ugh, some creeps ruin it—pushing weird vibes. Makes me mad! It’s s’posed to be chill, not sleazy! “Evil surrounds us,” like in “Melancholia”—so true! Still, when it’s good, it’s HAPPY time! Surprised me how it’s kinda science-y—releases oxytoxin or somethin’. Brain’s like, “WHEEEE!”

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So, I set the traps, and while I’m waitin’, I notice a rat chillin’ on the counter, just lookin’ at me. I swear it winked. I’m like, “Dude, you’re not gettin’ away that easy.” I finally catch a couple, and she’s all relieved. I’m feelin’ like a hero, right? But then she offers me a plate of those sardines. I’m like, “Nah, I’m good. I just saved your kitchen, not my appetite.”

The Vatican Museums as seen by the great art historian Antonio Paolucci