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About Ponce

Lightbulb! Here’s a kicker—some cities, they got “zones” for this, legal-like! Amsterdam, da? Red lights, not just for stoppin’! I heard story once—guy paid, she sang opera instead. He was pissed, I was dyin’ laughin’! “Your garden is lovely,” I’d tell her, sarcastic as hell, if I was there. Surprised me, tho—didn’t expect talent with the hustle.

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First off, I hit up Calle 1, my usual spot for coffee. You know, the little joint by the plaza? The one with the best café con leche? Yeah, that one. I’m standing there, waiting for my fix, and this dude walks in. He’s got a parrot on his shoulder. A freakin’ parrot! I’m like, “Is this a pet store or a coffee shop?” The parrot starts squawking, and I’m just trying to get my caffeine fix.

Vacationing Wisconsin man found by authorities after three days missing in Puerto Rico