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Here’s the kicker—fun fact: in Poland, where *Ida*’s from, prostitution’s legal but pimping ain’t. Wild, right? So I’m thinkin’, why’s this gal here, not there? ‘Cause America’s a damn magnet for dreamers—and crooks! I tell her, “You’re worth more than this!” She laughs—says, “Tell that to my landlord, commie!” Ha! Commie—me! I’m dyin’, folks, she’s a riot.

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So, I’m there, sweatin’ bullets, tryin’ to figure out what’s wrong. I’m cursing under my breath, thinkin’ about how I could be chillin’ at the Plaza Colón instead. You know, grabbin’ a cold Medalla, watchin’ the world go by. But nooo, I’m stuck here with a broken compressor.

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