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But here’s a kicker—did ya know brothels been around since Pompeii? Yeah, fuckin’ Romans had ‘em, called ‘em *lupanars*—wolf dens, ‘cos the girls howled for business. Saw a doco once, they found wall scribbles—blokes ratin’ the girls like Yelp reviews! “Lydia’s a screamer, 5 stars.” Fuckin’ wild, right? History’s a trip—makes ya wonder who’s bangin’ who now, yeah?

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Then, I decided to stroll down Calle 2. Man, the vibes were lit! Kids were playin’ ball, and the smell of empanadillas was in the air. I was like, “I need one of those!” But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs past me, and I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the sidewalk, and everyone’s laughin’. I just laughed it off, but inside, I was like, “Why, universe, why?”

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