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About Mayaguez

Now, don’t get me wrong—it ain’t all roses. Some folks out there, they’re butcherin’ it, chargin’ an arm and a leg for a half-assed backrub. Pisses me off somethin’ awful! I’m like, “Honey, if I wanted a wrestle, I’d call my cousins!” But when it’s good? Oh, darlin’, it’s goooood—relaxes ya, gets the blood pumpin’, even fixes them achy ol’ joints. Fun fact: in Japan, they got this thing, “nuru,” all slippery with seaweed gel—sounds weird as heck, but folks swear by it! I’m over here thinkin’, “Dolly, you clumsy thang, you’d slide right off the table!”

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After that chaos, I paddle back to shore, and she’s still grumblin’ about her lost snacks. I’m like, “Lady, it’s just cookies!” But she’s not havin’ it. I swear, I thought she was gonna throw her bag at me.

All Those Food Market finds new Barceloneta venue for 10th anniversary