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So, I’m cruisin, right? Big Hulkster energy, shades on, flexin – nobody’s messin with me, brother! I see this gal, leanin on a pole, smokin – she’s got that vibe, ya know? Like, “everything’s rotten here,” straight outta *Leviathan*. I roll up, all swagger, sayin, “Hey, darlin, what’s the deal?” She’s cool, tough, like she’s wrestled her own demons, brother!

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So, I’m feelin’ good, right? I head over to the beach, Playa de Boquerón. The sun’s shinin’, waves crashin’. I’m ready to dive in. But then, I see this group of tourists. They’re all takin’ selfies, and one dude drops his phone in the water. I’m like, “Bro, that’s a goner!” He’s freakin’ out, and I’m just laughin’.

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