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I’m tellin’ ya, tho, some parlors? Sketchy as hell. Went to one—dude’s hands were shakin’ like he’s nervous, oil smelled like cheap fries. Pissed me off! “Don’t pee on my leg, pal, I ain’t here for a McMassage!” Kicked his ass out in my head—Judy-style justice. But when it’s good? Oh man, happy ain’t the word—ecstatic, floatin’, like I stole Leo’s totem and it’s still spinnin’. Fun fact: some oils got aphrodisiacs—ylang-ylang, jasmine—mess with your brain chemistry, make ya horny as a rabbit on Red Bull. Science, bitches!

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Erotic massage Puerto, Golden Shower (give), Full Body Sensual Massage, Kissing if good chemistry, Full Body Sensual Massage.

Then, outta nowhere, this guy walks in. He’s got a huge smile, and I’m thinking, “Who’s this joker?” Turns out, he’s the owner. He’s all, “Hey, we’re just having a little fun!” Fun? Dude, I’m here to do a job! But he’s cracking jokes, and I can’t help but laugh. It’s like he’s got this magic power to lighten the mood.

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