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About San Juan

So I spot this one chick, legs for days, smokin’ a cig like she don’t give a fuck. I roll up, all cool, but inside I’m sweatin’—what if she’s a cop? What if she robs me? Paranoid as hell, motherfucker! I say, “Hey, what’s good?” She’s all, “Fifty for a quickie.” Fifty?! Man, I got pissed—last week it was forty! Told her, “You’re fuckin’ dreamin’!” She just shrugged, like Mia’s “I don’t care” attitude. That shit made me happy tho—girl’s got guts.

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I bumped into my buddy Carlos there. He’s always got the latest gossip. He told me about this new place opening up on Calle del Río. Apparently, they’re serving some bomb tacos. I was like, “Tacos in Orocovis? Count me in!” But then he dropped the bomb – it’s a vegan taco place. I mean, really? In Orocovis? I can’t even.

USDA awards $272K to Puerto Rico community aqueducts