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Surprised me, tho—did ya know some escorts got PhDs? Swear to gawd, one chick I read bout, she’s fundin’ her dissertation! I’m over here, jaw dropped, thinkin’, “Smart AND sassy? Sign me up!” This app’d have filters—blonde, brunette, brainiac, ya name it! I’m typin’ this so fast, typos everywhere—sory, hon, I’m a mess!

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So, I keep walking, and I hit up Calle 3. There’s this little market there, you know? I’m browsing, looking for some fresh fruit. I spot some mangos, and I’m like, “Yes, please!” But then, this lady starts arguing with the vendor. She’s all like, “I’m not paying that much!” And I’m thinking, “Lady, it’s a mango, not gold!” But she’s relentless. I’m just trying to buy my fruit, and they’re going back and forth. Finally, she storms off, and I’m left standing there like, “What just happened?”

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