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In the end, it’s quick, messy, and I’m thinkin’, “Why’d I bother?” Made me laugh, tho—me, Homer Simpson, chasin’ tail like some badass. Sarcasm time: yeah, real smooth, champ! Next time, I’m stickin’ to TV and beer—cheaper, safer, and Marge don’t yell. D’oh! What a night, man, what a night!
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Turns out, he’s claiming his roof got damaged in a storm. But I’m looking up, and I see more holes than a slice of Swiss cheese. I’m thinking, “Man, you sure this ain’t just bad maintenance?” I ask him about it, and he gets all defensive. “I’m not a handyman!” he yells. I’m like, “Chill, bro. I’m not here to judge your life choices.”
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