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Here’s a wild tidbit—did ya know some prostitutes in history were spies? True story! Sneakin’ secrets while folks were busy droolin’. Blows my mind, man. Anyway, I’m chattin’ her up, keepin’ it cool. “What’s your name, girl?” She goes, “Call me Haku,” winkin’ like she knows the movie. I’m shook—happy as hell! A *Spirited Away* fan? In *this* gig? Universe is wild, fam.

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New South Wales has a reputation for some of the most liberal prostitution laws in Australia and Sydney is well known for its brothels; not only for the sheer number of them but the range of Missing: Luquillo.

Then, this guy comes up to me, super angry. He’s like, “Where’s my drink?” I’m thinking, “Dude, chill! It’s a bar, not a drive-thru.” But I keep my cool. I apologize, and he softens up. Turns out, he’s just hangry. I hook him up with a free drink, and he’s all smiles.

Populations are not declining and food webs are not collapsing at the Luquillo Experimental Forest