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About San Juan

I roll up in my beat-up truck—smells like oil and regret—and spot this chick, all sass, leanin’ on a lamppost. “Hey, darlin’, what’s the deal?” I rasp, tryin’ not to sound like a total creep. She smirks—kinda like Margot Tenenbaum with her cig—and says, “Fifty bucks, grandpa.” Fifty?! I choke—“That’s half my rent!”—but she don’t care. She’s got that “I’m adopted” vibe, y’know, from the movie? Tough as nails, but somethin’ sad underneath.

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So, I’m rushin’ to a community meeting at Plaza de Recreo. I’m late, of course. I sprint down Calle de la Cruz, dodging potholes like I’m in a video game. Coamo streets are like a minefield, man! I swear, if I trip on one more crack, I’m gonna lose it.

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