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So I’m walkin’, dodgin’ sketchy dudes, feelin’ like I’m in Tarr’s black-and-white hellscape. “The world has gone mad,” I whisper—another *Werckmeister* gem—cuz it’s true! Cops could roll up any sec, and I’m like, “I’m just researchin’, officer!” Yeah, right. Heart’s poundin’, palms sweaty—then bam, I spot her. She’s got this vibe, y’know? Not glamorous, not tragic—just there, doin’ her thing. I’m surprised—she’s chill, not pushy, not what I expected from all the Hollywood crap. “How much?” I blurt, feelin’ dumb. She smirks—$50, quick and dirty. Deal.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Calle Luis Muñoz Marín. You know, the one with the best café con leche? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual, and the barista, this dude named Carlos, was like, “You want extra sugar?” I was like, “Nah, I’m sweet enough.” He laughed, but I was serious. I mean, who needs more sugar when you’re already living in paradise, right?

Arecibo telescope was doomed by hurricane damage and human failures, says report