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Little fact—ancient China had this shit. Called it “tuina,” but sexy style. Emperors got down with it, hush-hush. Blows my mind, history’s freaky! Got me hyped, like—damn, people been naughty forever. But yo, some parlors? Sketchy as hell. Made me mad once—dude rushed it, no soul. I’m like, “Bruh, respect the craft!”

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After the rain, I’m finally getting somewhere. I’m applying the treatment, and it’s looking good. I’m feeling like a superhero, saving the day one rusty pipe at a time. But then, I slip. Yup, right on the wet ground. I go down hard. I’m lying there, staring at the sky, thinking, “This is how I go out? In Aguadilla, covered in anticorrosion goo?”

Frontier Airlines began flights to a second destination in Puerto Rico