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About Warsaw

I roll up, shades on, feelin like a champ. This chick struts over—legs for days, skirt shorter than a jobber’s career. “What’s your name?” I growl, all Hulkster bravado. She’s like, “Does it matter?” Ha! Cold as ice, brother! Made me laugh, but also pissed me off—gimme somethin to work with, lady! I’m thinkin, “I lie to myself all the time,” like in *Memento*. Am I even here for this? Brain’s spinnin.

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First stop, the office. I’m a document specialist, which sounds fancy but really just means I deal with a ton of papers. Ugh. I’m walking down ul. Powstańców Śląskich, and it’s buzzing. Like, people everywhere. I swear, I almost tripped over a dog. Not just any dog, but a massive one. I’m talking Great Dane level. I’m like, “Dude, you’re not a dog, you’re a horse!”