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So, I’m skippin’ along—la-di-da—thinkin’, “Where’s the action?” Maybe near Jellyfish Fields? Nah, too quiet. Then BAM! I spot her—red lipstick, fins swayin’, smokin’ a kelp cig. “Hey, lady!” I yell, all chipper. She’s like, “What’s your deal, square?” I’m sweatin’—well, underwater, so I’m just wetter, ha! “Life’s a cesspool,” she mutters, straight outta *Leviathan*. Got me shook!

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Tomek. He’s like, “Let’s hit up the bar later!” I’m like, “Yes, please!” I need a drink after this day.