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I knew this chick once, Candy – swear that’s her name. She’d strut in, order a gin fizz, tip like a queen. Said she made more in a night than I did in a month. Happy as hell for her, but damn, that stung! “God doesn’t care,” she’d say, laughin’. Sounded like somethin’ from *A Serious Man* – all cynical and shit. Made me think – maybe she’s right?

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Then, I bumped into my buddy, Tomek. He’s always got the craziest stories. He told me about this wild party last weekend. Apparently, someone tried to DJ with a potato. A potato! I mean, how does that even work? We laughed so hard, I almost spilled my cappuccino.