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This one time, I matched with some prat—thought he was clever, quotin’ poetry. Turned out, he nicked it off X, didn’t even write it! Fuming, I was—wanted to drown him like Nemo’s mum got crushed by that barracuda. “Just keep swimming,” I told meself, but nah, I ghosted him faster than you can say “Lannister gold.” Surprised me how many liars are out there, fishin’ for a quick fuck with fake charm. Makes me laugh, too—pathetic, innit?

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The vibe at the party is lit! Music blasting, people dancing. I grab a drink and start mingling. But then, I see that same dude from earlier. The one who can’t park. He’s there, trying to impress some girls. I’m dying inside. Like, bro, you’re not fooling anyone.

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